Retarded Marketing

I am a sucker for Dove chocolate… especially the dark variety. The only thing that bugs me about it is the “promise” inside each wrapper.

Once upon a time the promises weren’t so corny, but these days I have found messages like “Whisper in the dark” and “Discover yourself”… yeah, who in the Dove marketing department thought those were good ideas? And those are the only two I can remember. There were so many worse than that. Next time I will keep all the wrappers so I can report how hokey each one is. Who wouldn't want a little "promise" commentary?


Terry said...

I can totally relate! I love Dove chocolates too. I have often sarcastically read the promises out loud to David in a romantic voice. I have even commented to him the exact same sentiment that you did about how nuts the marketing department is. Maybe I'm just not sentimental or deep enough for this stuff.

David said...

So I couldn't resist. I got a random handful of Terry's Dove Dark Chocolates from the cupboard. Here are the sentiments:

"Write a real letter, not just an email." Who writes letters? And does the USPS still even print stamps?

"Smile. People will wonder what you've been up to." Smiling like a fool is a good way to get yourself shanked where I work!

"Make a list of your dreams." I didn't know Dove blogged. That sounds like one of those annoying memees people tag each other with!

"Remember your first everything." Something should be FORGOTTEN.

"Be fearless." Zzzzz.

Do all these Doves make me look fat?

Liam's Mom - Gina said...

You two are quite the pair! Thanks David for taking it upon yourself to do the research and get a head start on the commentary. I absolutely loved it!

Get the dark ones, you won't eat as many. They are too rich! And, no, you don't look fat.

Tori :) said...

That IS corny!! How funny.

Terri@SteelMagnolia said...

I like:

JUST DO IT!!!!!!!!!!!

Oh wait...
that was NIKE!

Okay.. well....


Robin said...

I love the dark Dove's chocolate's. I will have to be more observant and read the sayings next time instead of shoving the chocolate in my mouth and throwing the evidence away as quickly as possible.

Suzanne said...

LOL! How cheesy! My hubby really likes the Dove dark ones too, but I prefer the milk chocolates. So good! :)

Kayelyn said...

I got one several years ago that said, "Who needs therapy when you have chocolate." Haven't read one I liked since.

BTW- I do milk chocolate- Dark gives me a migraine.